Monthly Money Check-in: February '13

I am missing my high. My monthly fix is not there, the one I get when I look back over the last month and say "Yeah, I kicked ass!" I'm puttering.

My big mistake this month was agreeing to a vacation that I don't have money for right now. In March, my boyfriend and I wanted to go somewhere. I said Costa Rica. He said Hawaii. Both have mountains and beaches, and he has a friend in Hawaii, so I said sure. When you think of vacation in March your brain says, "Remind me to save up for that so we can buy that in March."

Then like two seconds later my boyfriend says, "We should really get the tickets soon." March turns out to be busy season, so he bought the tickets and said I could just pay him back. There is no way in hell I am starting another month owing him money, so both paychecks this month, I paid him back $280 for a total of a $560 plane ticket. It did not do very much to help me get out of debt.

Some old feelings have met me this month. Worry that I won't make it to the next paycheck, embarrassment that I couldn't afford a dinner. I kept bugging the girl at work who does the commissions to see if I was getting any. I kept feeling like I'd made the wrong choices and wanted to turn back. Why did I agree to come to this restaurant? What am I going to get my mom for her birthday? Why did I agree to this vacation?

It is much better to not do something than to try to do something you can not afford. I knew that already. True, by the time March comes around, I could probably scrap together the entire cost. But that is like buying something on credit.

But it happened, moving on. I'm still going to Hawaii with my love. Everything is ok. It's just a bad kind of choice that one does not want to make a habit of, a relic of the way I used to live.

My 401(k) was still in effect this month, so my investments went up. My house went down, still waiting on the foreclosure. As "Hawaii poor" as I am, I still sent $50 to my emergency fund and an extra $50 to my student loan.

So, I increased my net worth by $1,505 even though my house went down so much. 

I hate when I break my little graph's neck.

All my other graphs are slow and steady up and up.

Other good news is in my budgets. While I was still unable to stay out of the damn restaurants, I spent only half my budget on going out and only $2 on coffee in the whole month! My work got a new machine that's, well, it's ok. It's not terrible, and with Hawaii on my mind, I'll take it.